Posts Tagged ‘Louisiana’

Designated Driver is a Life Saver

August 1, 2011 Leave a comment

It looks like our buddy Mikie Mikes got some competition for father of the year: The father of the year is back!!

LIVINGSTON – A Mississippi man was arrested Saturday and accused of allowing his 8-year-old son to drive his pickup truck while the man slept in the passenger seat, aLouisiana State Policespokeswoman said.

Just after 6:30 a.m., troopers received a call from a concerned motorist traveling west on Interstate 12 nearHolden, Trooper Melissa Matey said.

The motorist said a child appeared to be driving a greenChevroletpickup truck erratically along the interstate, Matey said.

Troopers pulled the truck over just west of La. 447 inLivingston Parishand determined that an 8-year-old boy was driving the truck, Matey said.

The boy’s 4-year-old sister was in the back seat of the truck’s cab, Matey said. The boy’s father, Billy Joe Madden, 28, ofHattiesburg, Miss., was in the front passenger seat.

After interviewing Madden, troopers concluded the man was intoxicated and had been sleeping while his son drove the vehicle, Matey said. The family was traveling from Hattiesburg to Dallas.

The boy and girl were turned over toChild Protective Servicesto await the arrival of a family member, Matey said.

Madden was arrested and booked into the Livingston Parish Jail on two counts of child desertion and no child restraint. He was booked on one count each of parent allowing a minor to drive, open container and no seat belt. Bail was set at $1,474.

Child desertion?? He was sitting right there …. I mean c’mon police these days, every time they pull you over they want to try to charge you with everything but the Kennedy Assassination …… We got a parent here who is trying to help his son get ahead by teaching him important life skills at a young age, and at the same time teaching both his kids the value of having a designated driver. And some self righteous do-gooder has to stick their nose in where it doesn’t belong and get the law involved….

Ironically these children actually would have been better off it they had been deserted. Some how I was not surprised to see our friend was not wearing a shirt when he was brought in. It’s absolute poetic justice that this occured in Livingstone Parish.

What I still don’t get is how the hell does an eight year old child drive a car? How can he possibly reach the pedals??

and bail $1,474 are kidding me I’ve had my bail higher than that every time I’ve gotten arrested, and while far from a decent human being my level of jackassism hasn’t yet risen to the level of international news (fear not there’s still time).

where was the mother in all this? Maybe she was this chick: A Good Woman is Hard to Find.

Now this may not look good for Louisiana, but at least we’re not Idaho. Billy Joe Madden does look like he is probably on the Livingston Parish city council, but at least he’s not a STATE SENATOR …..Police: State senator stole truck after drinking

Here again we have a dedicated public servant simply trying to teach a lesson about not leaving your keys in your car, and all people can do is harass him….

Apparently the driver, who deputies say was Senator John McGee, was trying to turn the rig around. Carleton’s sons then said the driver ran around the house and up and down the gravel road. Carleton found him in the back seat.

“He said he was looking for the promised land,” Carleton said. “He didn’t know where he was at. He was dazed and confused. He was in another world.”

Yes the “promise land” isn’t that what we are all looking for Johnny …. I guess we can rule out the Idaho State Senate and the back seat of a stolen truck as possible locations….

This only underscores the wisdom of our original protagonist , Mr. Madden,  because clearly the mistake Senator McGee made was not bringing along one of his small children to take the wheel when things got hairy.

Remember the designated driver is a life saver.


Festivous for the Rest of US!!!

August 11, 2010 Leave a comment

Cracklin Festival Logo
So I recently Had reason for my online caravan to stop by the OFFICIAL website for the Town of Port Barre, La.!

 … details are sketchy but there is a rumor that they had put a price on my head (the last thing the sheriff said was “… and NO disintegration) for driving above the posted speed limit and not paying the fine or attending court. I’m not able to confirm or deny anything at this time…

Anywho while there I stumbled on to a link that informed me of a very significant cultural event that I here-to-fore had no knowledge of (I’m not very cultured).


Begun in 1985, the Port Barre Cracklin Festival is the major fundraiser for the Port Barre Lions Club.  Attended by thousands of festival goes each year, it is a very important cultural event for the city of Port Barre and St. Landry Parish.

The festival contains all of the usual features found in many Southern Louisiana community festivals.  There is a Queen’s Pageant with fifteen different age divisions, a parade down Main Street, carnival rides for all ages, live musical entertainment from local and regional artists, great food and drinks, and of course, the Cracklin Cook-Off.

The Cracklin Cook-Off is one of the highlights of each Cracklin Festival.  The Cook-Off is not only a test of cracklin cooking ability, but showmanship as well.  Divided into a Professional category for established restaurants and chefs, and an amateur category for people who just love to cook cracklins!  Prizes are awarded for both quality of cracklins, and booth presentation.

THERE IS A GOD!!!!!  I know one thing for absolutely certain, if there is anything in this world that deserves to be honored with a yearly festival its deep-fried pig fat … In case you’re wondering this is a good explanation of cracklins and the author is clearly a fellow citizen of the great state of Louisiana so you can check it out.

Now don’t get me wrong I love the hell out of some cracklins, the kind they sell near Port Barre not the processed crap the sell in  gas stations nationwide, but a festival …. a four freaking day festival …. The fact we are last in so much but are, I think its safe to say, the only place in the universe that has a festival … a FOUR day festival …. honoring deep-fried pork fat wraps up in a nutshell everything that I love about Louisiana. I’m sure lots of places they eat pork cracklins, but based modern thinking on nutrition (which changes every five minutes) most people kinda try to keep the fact that they love eating deep-fried fat on the DL but in Louisiana … Oh hell no … we throwing a party, a four-day festival with bands, contest, the whole nine….

For christ sake there’s even a BEAUTY PAGEANT …. yes you hard me right the festival to celebrate the deep frying of the pig has a BEAUTY PAGEANT and elects a QUEEN!! It’s got to be a somewhat dubious honor to be elected queen of the pig fat frying festival doesn’t it … If you ever moved from the immediate area you’d have to be careful about how you explained that trophy lest people get the wrong idea and think is was some kind of weird fetish thing…

I got to be honest I think this is the most Coon-ass thing I have ever heard of EVER and I’ve lived in south Louisiana for like 30 years …

Look I get it it’s about going out there and celebrating South Louisiana Culture listening to Cajun music, eating good food, and possibly even having a few cocktails. If LSU is not playing at home that weekend (which I’m sure they’re not since everyone in South Louisiana knows that all life in the fall must be planned around LSU football) I might even go, especially if it involves free cracklins ….

which sounds like a recipe for a wide-spread out break of salmonella which would make the pie eating contest scene in “Stand by Men” look like childs play …

But you have to admit you laughed your ass off when you heard there is a Cracklin Festival …. The only way to make this better is if someone could assure me that some type of ‘greased pig chase’ was part of the festivities lol …..


[tweetmeme source=1billy1 only_single=false]

As i was saying …. future ex-hurricane Bonnie

July 22, 2010 Leave a comment

Update: from Da Masta’s Dr. Jeff Masters most recent blog

Tropical Depression Three is steadily organizing, and appears poised to become a much stronger storm than was forecast.


My low-confidence intensity forecast gives TD 3 a 40% chance of becoming a hurricane. NHC is putting the odds of TD 3 being a hurricane at 8 am Sunday at 15% with their 11am advisory, but may up this with the 5pm advisory.

and the place on the gulf coast with the highest strike probability is ….. New Orleans …

we are all totally F#$%ed

P.S. if you know me and you live in inland Texas now would be a good time to start getting the guest bed room ready … just saying …. hurricane hits Le Singe means Hurricane Le Singe hits you …. This thing will be TS Bonnie by the end of the day …. and I ain’t talking bout Trans Sexual…

And what kind of name is Bonnie … at least Katrina sounded Slavishly evil and Gustav Teutonicly aggressive …. Bonnie sounds like she might show up with potato salad …

Preparing to run like a girl primate

~Le Singe

[tweetmeme source=1billy1 only_single=false]

And lastly a little old school south Louisiana fo ya

July 16, 2010 5 comments

I love that subtle bassline in the back ground.
just between me and you … I ❤ bounce music reminds me of listening to Q93.3 rolling around drinking 40s as a high school moron

ok promise I’ll stop now.

rottt-ooh raggy

July 1, 2009 Leave a comment

Dow Chemical to close 3 Louisiana plants

Dow Chemical to close 3 Louisiana plants as company moves further into specialty chemicals

  • On Wednesday July 1, 2009, 9:19 am EDT

MIDLAND, Mich. (AP) — Dow Chemical will close three Louisiana plants as the company shifts away from basic chemicals and more toward the lucrative business of specialty chemicals, the company said Wednesday Dow has said it will cut about 2,500 jobs as part of a restructuring that came with the acquisition of rival Rohm & Haas. About 100 jobs, part of that restructuring, will be cut with the closure of the plants, but most employees will be offered jobs elsewhere. The plants that will be closed make ethylene, which is used in everything from packaging to plastic bags. The company bought rival Rohm & Haas in April for more than $16 billion, a deal that added massive amounts of debt to its balance sheet, but gave the company a strong position in the specialty chemicals market. Dow says closing the plants will lead to savings of more than $100 million a year, part of a multibillion-dollar restructuring.Shares of Dow rose 6 cents to $16.20 in premarket trading. 

From Yahoo Finance

Good to see our razor Sharp local media is right on top of this one….not! (in their defense there is nothing in the WSJ yet either but WSJ is now owned by fox so what do you expect). Well at least we made a bold step this legislative session to fully fund education to cultivate the resources that will attract ‘new economy’ type business’ to our state ….DOH! People are short sited to the extreme here and believe lower taxes cure allllllllll evils. Well now that it is becoming clear that we no longer have a competitive advantage in the petro-chemical industry and due to our refusal to make sacrifices to be competitive in any other business (i.e. our whole state is perpetually uneducated barefoot and pregnant) what the hell are we going to do? Should we apply to become a vassal of Texas…… =X

Edit: looks like the advocate is on it now. It also looks like origanal artical was not exactly right, the artical in the advocate says it is simply ‘units’ of certain plans and not entire plants

Categories: Serious life..., WTF Tags: ,
%d bloggers like this: