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ummmmm ……. seriously

January 4, 2012 Leave a comment

Well this makes perfect sense …. I mean when you think historical figures that are perfect for the next great rom com or sweeping epic romantic drama who else comes to mind but Karl Marx. I mean at the mere mention of Karl Marx the eroticism just jumps off the page. You think the twilight mania was bad just wait till the ladies get ahold of this

A portrait of Karl Marx.

Image via Wikipedia

that is one hot hunk of manwich right there …. you thought JT brought sexy back, but you have no idea…..

…. I can’t believe it took so long for someone to write this. And forget sonnets, love songs, works of art, or beaches at sunset nothing and I mean nothing gets the romantic juices flowing like 160 year old economic and political theory.  The potential new Viagra commercials practically write themselves. Whats next  a retelling of a christmas carol except with Stalin in the place of the Scrooge . Imagine Lenin uttering the “you had me at hello *tear*” line…..

So things aren’t looking so good in the print medium, but at least we can look to film for some quality entertainment

hold on just a second as I’m currently trying to stab myself in the eye with a pencil ……

So this pretty much makes the Geico caveman sitcom look like a brilliant idea. I mean in virtually every photo he’s ever taken Abraham Lincoln looks like

He’s seconds away from jumping up and kicking some vampire ass …… I mean look at the absolute Joie de Vivre and excitement radiating from ole honest Abe …. This guy is custom made to be an action hero. And with all the mass hysteria over vampires this will give Abe just the right exposure to prime to pump for the buddy comedy he’s shooting next with Jackie Chan ….where Lincoln is a disgruntled old cop who can’t get over the fact to Mary Todd left him for Karl Marx (as discussed above you can’t really blame her). Jackie Chan gets assigned to be Abe’s partner and teaches him to start living and loving life again all in the mist of them busting up an international drug ring led by some of the top cops in the department ….. I can smell the Oscar already.

I guess they got tired of making shit remakes of old movies so now its time to try to making shitty new movies with old characters….

Grenada has Reopened for offshore banking!!! *hi5*

July 7, 2010 Leave a comment

 Post-Ponzi scheme, Grenada to reopen for offshore banking

Critics fear little has changed since an American with no money, no experience, and a passport from a fictitious country was allowed to capitalize a bank, defrauding investors of $170 million.

Now to put “phase II” of the master plan into action….. 

I saw an “American Greed” on this the other night … unbelievable

Grenada licensed more than 40 banks, most of which had collapsed by 2003, according to Mr. Marchant. FIBG was the most infamous, offering interest rates to North American depositors as high as 300 percent annually. Backed by a photograph of a 10,000-carat ruby, at one point it claimed assets in excess of $26 billion.

A picture …. are you kidding me …. Then again you could make the argument that it has been shown recently that several U.S. and other “first world” countries bank’s we back by essentially the same thing.

Before I go further I want to say that I do feel sorry for the victims of this, we all at one time or another are susceptible to fraud, so it is not my intention to needlessly bash them. However I think in these situations it is very often the case that the criminals are not the only ones at fault. The scam was offering returns on what were essentially CDs of up to 250% per year GUARANTIED, and a return of close to 100% per year on a deposit of only $5,000.00 for 5 years again GUARANTIED.

here is a pdf braking it down this comes from the site www.offshorealert.com

You really have to scratch your head on this one a little …. at least with the Madoff scheme they were offering only a steady 10%, or the Stafford deal where it was like up to 20% or something. I mean it is my contention that people who did sufficient due diligence of these funds should have seen red flags, but at least those numbers are at least remotely plausible. Unlike 100% and up to 250% which is totally ridiculous, how could anyone believe this was possible. Legit banks offer something in the neighborhood of 10% and people chase after an extra .25% here and there. It’s beyond me how anyone of sound mind could believe that there was some simple GUARANTIED investment out there offering ten times that …. The only explanation possible is greed. Not to mention the fact that there have been so many offshore scams throughout the years that you should know that this is not something you should ever ever EVER mess with. It’s really outrageous.

This story SCAMMED! talks about one of the victims:

Brown told the Freunds he was so confident in the deal that he was investing his own money. The Freunds were skeptical, but Stanford cut a check for $150,000 in September 2000.

The Freunds watched their partner’s investment closely. As promised, big interest payments rolled in. Don Freund was still torn. “You just don’t get those kinds of returns,” he says. “I knew that.” But Freund was tired of busting his hump in the bowling business, and his wife, a corporate flight attendant, wanted to spend more time at home.

The Freunds ran the numbers again and again. If they scraped together all their assets, they could come up with $200,000. That would provide them with interest payments of $5,175 every month. “We’d be right at 40 years old taking home more than $5,000 a month, with no bills and no stress,” Freund recalls thinking.

What I don’t get is Mr. Freunds “says” he was skeptical (good call), but then he was blinded by keeping up with the jones, or in this case the Stanfords, so he decide to get in (bad call). But what I don’t understand is, if there is something I know is BS, but I can’t resist getting involved in then maybe I’d put a little in and see what happens, not that I think this is a good way to do things and I’d at least like to think I would never do this. However it is totally illogical that you would go from “allegedly” knowing something was BS to scraping together ALL OF YOUR ASSETS to invest. Again the only explanation is greed, they didn’t want to work anymore, which I totally understand, but only putting ALL of their money in would allow that so they didn’t test the waters they jumped right in….

Also it is a univeral truth that any time there is shananagans going on there’s gonna be a “brownie” involved

“Shellie was the first one who said, ‘Something’s wrong,'” Don Freund admits. “I wanted to believe that everything was all right. I told her, ‘Brownie [Mark Brown] wouldn’t screw us.'”

You’re doing a hell of a job Brownie.

The scary thing about this is all these victim’s stories involve investments of like $50,000.00 to $250,000.00 and in total the scam defrauded $170 million. That means there is way more than you would ever guess, people out there among us that would literally throw their money away on a scam that should have been obvious to even Forrest Gump. It’s the same thing with the Nigerian scam It is totally beyond my ability to comprehend how anyone could fall for that, but if you look at the fact that they keep doing it, that it is so prevalent it has a nickname, and all the Law Enforcement warnings about it, it becomes clear that probably millions of people have gotten taken by it. It would be easy to believe we are living in a world of morons …. but even a cranky dirty ole bastard like me can not go there …. no the truth is greed is an incredibly powerful thing and we all are susceptible to it if we let ourselves be. Sure there are people who end up rich by being at the right place at the right time or by winning the lottery, but I’ve never ever ever EVER heard of anyone getting rich by just happening to stumble upon an “investment opportunity” that was 10 times better than the norm. It NEVER HAPPENS when you see things like this you have to know that it is a 100% probability that it’s a scam …. right here I’d love to just scream out THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FREE MONEY no one is just going to give you money, but this story here involves a bunch of people who apparently did just throw their money away, they just gave it to someone. So we will have to amend it to say unless you are a criminal who is knowingly conduction criminal activity THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS FREE MONEY ….. if it sounds to good to be true it probably is …. if it sounds to good to be even physically possible then it isn’t.

Now back to where we started “phase II” I’m starting a bank in this out-of-the-way place called Grenada we have unique investment opportunities in the Indian beef industry, a Saudi Arabian “hot pants” company, and a South African company making plastic trumpets that make the most beautiful music in the world …. These choice investment opportunities allow me to offer you 300% annual return on your money and as a benefit I throw in free hookers and blow for life. If your interested don’t even bother contacting me, that’s only wasting time, just send me checks payable to Le Singe …. unmarked garbage bags of cash will also work!! …..

This is so freakin right on I had to share it!!

July 1, 2009 Leave a comment

This is so freakin right on I had to share it. Rich people have set up laws to give themselves special opportunities, but they want the rest of us to bail them out when they get in trouble…total horse shit. Hedge funds can only be invested in by accredited investor’s not by ordinary people. The reason for this is supposedly because these people have the back ground to know what they are getting into  AND they are wealthy enough to absorb the losses. You and I are banned from it because supposedly we can not, now I don’t necessarily agree with this (although I have no desire what-so-ever to invest in hedge funds, I agree with Mr. Buffets thinking about the 2 and 20 crowd) but if this is the way it’s going to be then so be it. However you can’t have it this way and then expect all of us peons to bail you out that is so obnoxious it’s ridiculous. If you put your entire net worth in some shady fund (and trust me anyone who checked it out at all knew it was shady, several people actually got involved with it specifically because they knew it was shady and wanted to piggy back on w/e scam Madoff was pulling) then sorry but you’re SOL.

I love the point he makes about how millions of us middle class are effected by scams each year identity thief etc. I personally was recently ripped off by a shady contractor in the wake of a natural disaster. What are we told when it happens to us ….basically SOL live and learn……I don’t have a problem with this because that’s the way things go and the world is a risky place. BUt I have a huge major problem with wealth people afforded BY LAW opportunities the rest of us don’t have getting bailed out when they run into the same type problems the rest of us have to deal with…it’s madding….I’m reminded on something Louis Black said when commenting on the Enron world com etc. thing several year’s ago. He basically said you hear stuff like this and you start understand why the Bastille was stormed and why they sent most of the ‘elite’  to the guillotine

Here is a like to a blog I wrote awhile back on some of the same issues

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