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Oh Crap….

Ok I tried to post part of this yesterday but the will of the mega-bites did not see fit for it to actually happen so I’m going to try again. First off this is the theme for today’s little fireside chat.


In this sprit l have to tell you that I got a flat tire and I was trying to change it and the truck fell off the jack while I was under it. My head and torso where under the car (actually truck which may well have saved me). So when you get on your knees tonight thank the good lord that your buddy Le Singe is still kicking.  I know this is going to sound weird and like a really ungrateful, selfish, jackass thing to think but do you ever narrowly escape death or get out of some jam or whatever, just by luck and then be pissed because you feel like you are using all your luck on avoiding bad things and not on getting good things. I know it’s crazy but that thought flashed across my mind when I was in a sour mood the other day. I mean I know for the most part I don’t feel that way, but there’s a small part of me that causes thoughts like that to pop up and I think I’d be much better off if that was not the case. Soooooooo Annnnnnyway that was good for a mild-heart attack to liven the work week up, there was three people there when it happened (insert you favorite how many engineers does it take to change a tire joke here) and they were all like OMG.



MANCHESTER, N.H. – The first clue that something might have been wrong was when a car pulled into a parking lot with a “No Parking” sign and post stuck to the front end.

A Cumberland Farms clerk called around dawn on Thursday to report the car. When officers showed up, the sign had fallen off, and they found a sleeping driver inside……..”



No parking!!  Honestly I don’t see what the big deal is here I mean the sign said ‘no parking’ and clearly she was not parking. In fact running over the stop sign knocking it down and having it embedded in your car all they way to your destination is pretty much the exact opposite of parking. I’d even go so far as to say logically since she did the exact opposite of what your not supposed to do that means she did the best possible thing. I mean really the only thing she did wrong was….*****Le Singe’s Pearls Of Wisdom Alert*****……if after having a few cocktails you feel and urgent need to pass the f@k out in your car be sure to get in the passenger seat first and remember you weren’t driving it was the one armed man *taps nose*. I picked this little gem up while I was in rehab many years ago and since thanks to the grace of god (and some action on my part) I have not had any need for it since so I thought I’d pass it on to those of you who might make better use of it. Tragically I’m a little late to help our heroine in this tale. 

I swear it wasn’t me….Come’on that camel was asking for it…..camels come from the mid-east and therefore its always their fault. Way to show that camel who is boss chief. Unfortunately I fear this sort of thing is an all to common occurance at ‘six flags’ locations through out our great land. This is just one more thing on a long list of reasons I’m glad I don’t drink anymore. 

So basically what I’m saying is be careful it’s a dangerous world out there…..


~Le Singe

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